Sunday, January 24, 2010

1-24-2010

Months have passed since my last blog. It has been 8 months since my mom passed away. I'm still trying to get my head on straight. I'm still trying to figure out what a "normal" day is. Being the responsible care person for someone with a life ending illness is massive to ones mental and physical self. While in the past, I dealt with serious, potentially life altering illness with one of my children, I can not imagine the toll on parents with children who are terminally ill.

The possessions still need to be weeded through some more, but I'm happy with what I've accomplished. I've taken care of quite a bit, given away what I can and incorporated some of those things that meant so much to her into my own life. I can only do that slowly, I find. I need to be careful not to lose my own self.

The hum-drum of working every day provides distractions.

I find that lately I get so angry with so many things that aren't right... power struggles over things that infringe on what is really right for the masses, in a quest to simply bigger ones own lot in life. Wow. That is it. That simple statement sums up all that has been bugging me... if I don't mention the crazy-ass dreams I've been having.